So... I've had a kinda scary weekend...

(cross posted at Live Journal)

Stroke.

I have had a stroke.

I am looking at the preceding words and still trying to come to grips with what this all means... for me, my family and friends.

This is going to take a while to type, seeing as my left hand and arm have lost a major portion of their function. But my doctor said trying to type would be good for my left hand. Already I can feel my brain trying to re-route the signals to the arm and hand.

My neurologist said that with therapy, my prognosis for a full or very close to full recovery is very good.

I am very grateful to be here typing this at all right now...

I'll keep this short, as I am getting tired. Saturday morning I got out of bed feeling odd... my left arm was tingling, my speech sounded like the village drunk from some early Irish novel and I was a little dizzy and lightheaded. I took a shower thinking that it was just cobwebs from sleeping. Mrs. Mojo took her shower and I was still feeling weird.

I also knew that these were classic stroke symptoms. I sat my wife down and explained what I was feeling and suggested that I go to the emmergency room. Needless to say she did not argue.

Long Beach Memorial got me in fairly quickly and got me a CT scan which came up negative. They were going to admit me for observation and testing but my insurance insisted on transferring me to Los Alamitos Medical Center. So I get an ambulance ride across town.

The next two days I get a series of MRIs that confirm what the first CT scan could not find. A mild to moderate stroke in a lower left part of the brain, caused by untreated severe hypertension and an arterial blockage in an artery going to the back of the brain. The treatment for this is primarily medicine... blood thinners, statins for cholesterol, beta blockers and so on...

Most of the day Sunday I could barely move my left arm. Then on Sunday night, I was dozing and Laurie suddenly asked if I was okay; my left arm was twitching as I slept. It felt funny; a tough sensation to describe, like it was getting a signal to move, but couldn't, then it twitched. I suddenly got a little feeling and use back. I could grab my water bottle and my voice was clearer.

It was not a miraculous cure... but it was a marginal improvement, and that moment, it was enough.

So where am I now? Well, Saturday was about keeping it together and putting on a brave face. Sunday was about icy cold fear and crying jags.

Today is about angry and fighting like hell.

There are some major lifestyle changes I am coming to terms with. I have about a jillion medical appointments in the next couple of weeks. I still uncontrolably cry, mostly when I think of small army of people who are ready to step up for me. And no words will ever be adequate to express my love and gratitude for me wife, without whom, I would not be here now.

Mostly, I am glad to be home.

mojo sends


P.S.: I blame George Bush