Friday, April 24, 2009

My Head Hurtz

I think my head will explode at some point very soon.

Since early 2003, when news first began surfacing that prisoners of war had been murdered while in the custody of U.S. forces in Afghanistan, I've been watching with growing apprehension as my suspicions about how systematic torture had been ordered and carefully directed from the most senior levels of the U.S. administration were confirmed again and again. We have now surpassed the point where even my darkest, most paranoid suspicions from 2003 have now been shown in 2009 to have been too forgiving.

Now, elite Washington opinion is converging on the combined monstrous view A) that yes, George Bush and his administration ordered prisoners of war to be tortured, B) that their explicit aim was to elicit false confessions of Iraqi WMD program activity and/or Iraqi-alQaeda cooperation, C) that yes, these were unequivocally crimes against humanity, and D) that no, prosecuting senior administration officials, including the former Vice President and President, for these crimes is not something my tender sensibilities should be subjected to endure.

I can't take it, you see. The experience of watching Dick Cheney go to the Big House for lying the country into going to war on false pretenses and ordering the torture of prisoners to elicit false confessions to cover up for those lies... that experience would make my head crack open from the strain of it all. Or so the beltway would have you believe.

Don't believe it. I'll be fine. Put the motherfuckers on trial. I'll brew a special batch of Revolution! strong ale, and we'll have a good celebration after the opening statements are done. I'll follow the proceedings every day on C-SPAN. I'll help my son follow along too. It will be highly educational for everyone.

But all those sad gits who keep making apologies for these monsters who did this? Those people are going to be the first up against the wall when the revolution comes. I'm going to enjoy making those people into useful contributing elements of the physical infrastructure. Peggy Noonan... how would you like to have your spine reinforced with steel re-bar so that you can act as a load-bearing support for a bicycle bridge in Golden Gate Park. George Will... we need your viscera to help keep the carnivorous plants in the Conservatory of Flowers from wilting. Glenn Beck... I have a very, very, very special place for you; it's right through that little door with the number 101 on it. On and on and on...

Like I said. My head. It hurtz. Please, for the love of Carlin, MAKE IT STOP!!

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