Sunday, July 25, 2004

Mojowire for 06.26; vol. 2, no. 11

J. Good morning, and welcome to The Mojowire, Vol. 2, No.11... I'm Mojo...

S. And I'm Sean, it's Saturday, June 26, 2004, Day 1,177 of the Neocon Captivity, and here's the news for the week gone-by...

J. Brought to you by Mojohaus-fine journalism, afflicting the comfortable since 1988. Now headlines, from Mojohaus:

S. First this morning, there is a new sherrif, or God-head, in town, and you have met his deputies in every airport you have ever been in. They are dressed in bad mu-mus and asking you for money for their pure-light of Christlove, the Rev. Moon of the Unification Church. Next time you see one of those moonies, look closely, it might be your Congressman.

J. Next, how weird is it that the President of the United States goes to Rome in an attempt to enlist the help of a cranky old cold-war Pope, nearly demanding that the Pontiff issue some sort of writ or commandmant or whatever you fellas in the funny hats do and order all those hippy American Bishops to get with the program and W. re-elected... stay tuned and find out how weird.

S. Then Strychnine rains down cauldrons of burning petroleum product upon our heads this week from on orbit, explaining how we have probably not seen the worst of the oil-price crisis and exactly who is to blame for this lovely condition... you'll be amazed at the culprits.

J. Finally this morning, it is quickly becoming the Night of the Long Knives for the Bush Administration, as Americans of all stations are becoming disenchanted and have figured out that there is something they can do about it.

…So stand by to stand by while we get ready to pull the pin on this thing...

J. John Gorenfeld who writes for Gadflyer Magazine Online has a question: Should Americans be concerned that on March 23rd a bipartisan group of Congressmen attended a coronation at which a billionaire, pro-theocracy newspaper owner was declared to be the Messiah – with royal robes, a crown, the works?

Or that this imperial ceremony took place not in a makeshift basement church or a backwoods campsite, but in a Senate office building? Umm, I don't know about the rest of America, but I just about horked up a lung. Congrss crowned the new Messiah? Funny, I don't recall that showing up in my morning newspaper? Does this happen often in Washington?..

Mr. Gorenfeld lays it out for us:
The Washington Post didn't think so. For a moment on April 4, a quote from the keynote speech was in the Web version of its "Reliable Sources" column. The speaker: Sun Myung Moon, 84, an ex-convict whose political activities were at the center of the 1976-8 Koreagate influence-peddling probe. That's when an investigation by Congress warned that Moon, after having befriended Richard Nixon in his darkest hour, was surrounding himself with other politicians to overcome his reputation: as the leader of the cult-like Unification Church, which recruited unwary college students, filled Madison Square Garden with couples in white robes, wed them in bulk and demanded obedience.

That was before he launched the Washington Times – "in response to Heaven’s direction," as he would later say – and a 20-year quest to make his enemies bow to him.

He has also claimed, in newspaper ads taken out by the Unification Church, that Jesus, Confucius, and the Buddha have endorsed him. Muhammad, according to the 2002 ad, led the council in three cries of "mansei," or victory. And every dead U.S. president was there, too – because Moon's gospel is inseparable from visions of true-blue American power.

Ohhh..thaaat Reverand Moon. I'm still reeling from the notion that dude had a vision where all the dead american presidents shoe iron for dealing out the wretched stuff that brought that horrible vision in front of his retina's.

This isn't a joke folks. The Revereand Moon, who sees visions of the Buddha and Christ along with the spooks of G Washington and Grover Clevleand, was crowned the Messiah on Federal property. Someone better strap down the Lincoln statue on the Mall, Honest ABe might get so cranked up in the afterlife about this we might have the reanimiated statue of the great emancipator asking some hard questins over at the rayburn building.

So, now that we've introduced our contestant, let's start our show...Mr Gorenfeld...what you got for us: First, we're shown a rabbi blowing a ram's horn. Most Jews would hold off on this until the High Holy Days, but it probably counts if the Moshiach shows up in a federal office building at taxpayer expense.

Then we see the man of the hour, Moon, chilling at a table at the Dirksen in a tuxedo, soaking all this up. He claps. He's having a ball.

Cut to the ritual. Eyes downcast, a man identified as Congressman Danny K. Davis (D-Ill.) is bringing a crown, atop a velvety purple cushion, to a figure who stands waiting austerely with his wife.

S. Now Moon is wearing robes that Louis XIV would have appreciated. All of this has quickly been spliced into a promo reel by Moon's movement, which implies to its followers that the U.S. Congress itself has crowned the Washington Times owner.

But Section 9 of the Constitution forbids giving out titles of nobility, setting a certain tone that might have made the Congressional hosts shy about celebrating the coronation on their websites. They included conservatives, the traditional fans of Moon's newspaper: Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.), Rep. Curt Weldon (R-PA.), Rep. Chris Cannon (R-Utah), Rep. Roscoe Bartlett (R-Md.) and Republican strategy god Charlie Black, whose PR firm represents Ahmed Chalabi’s Iraqi National Congress.

But there were also liberal House Democrats like Sanford Bishop (D-Ga.) and Davis. Rep. Harold Ford (D-Tenn.) later told the Memphis Flyer that he'd been erroneously listed on the program, but had never heard of the event, which was sponsored by the Washington Times Foundation."

Wow, for once something bizarre and disturbing happend and the Bush Adminisation wasn't involved. Well no, but what is involved is Washingtons premier conservative Newspaper, the Washington Times, owned lock, stock and libelous barrel by the Reverand Moon.

The Washington Times makes the Orange County Register look like a mimeographed copy of Worker's World Daily, and has a commitment to the truth akin to a bad hair day in Nazi Germany. The Reverand Moon, — or Mr. Messiah to you, hippie — is dedicated to many of the same goals as Right Wing Crank Nation, including depriving Gays of their basic human rights, and is Mr. Gorenfeld reminds us the Reverend wants " U.S. Constitution to be replaced by religious government that he calls "Godism," calling the church-state separation the work of Satan. "The church and the state must become one as Cain and Abel," he said in the same sermon."

Yeah, homophobe, a psycho who thinks he's the Messiah, a wealthy contributor to Republicna campaigns, and the Publisher of Right wing propaganda. Ohh.. and he runs a bizzare cult that proclaims him the Messiah. And he's a key sponsor of the Republican Party.

The moral of this disturbing, wretched story is that behind of the fa├žade of white bread, middle American Christianity, is in part a bizzare billionaire cult leader who controls a powerful media outlet and can recruit Congressman to participate in bizarre ceremonies where he declares himself the messiah.

And at the end of the day, when the Moon-ssiah calls, they not only come a runnin', but they offer him crash space at their crib and a few minutes of "special time" with the old lady, as long as he remembers their names when the fund raising letter arrives.

So the next time you are arguing over the water cooler with the office conservative about those damn deviant Hollywood liberals, Bust this little story out...Let's see how John Q. conservative feels about the Reverand Moon and the hand he has up the butt of the Republican Party..

J. Back in the dark days of the Nixon Administration, as the clock began to toll for the President and impeachment loomed, it's been said that President Nixon began talking to several of the portraits in the West Wing. It's altogether unclear what was said exactly, but considering Nixon's
considerable Paranoia and the depressing realization that he was likely to be the first President removed from office, it's not surprising that former Presidents began to speak to him, or that he was talking back.

So as we piece together some recent stories regarding the Bush Administration that sound a bit bizarre, even for them, we need to consider them in the large context of the grim realization that the Maximum Commander in Chief is not going to ride into the sweet and easy victory foretold by
the mighty Wizards Rove and Mehlman.

First, lets deal with some of the more empirical issues. This from Ruy Texiarea at "The Emerging Democratic Majority:

''Voters still favor Kerry over Bush (53-40) on which candidate can better handle the economy. That Kerry advantage is essentially unchanged since early May.

On the situation in Iraq, Kerry and Bush are nearly tied (47-46 in Bush's favor), a slightly improvement for Kerry over his 3 point deficit in early May. This tie is notable, of course, because sentiment is now so strikingly negative about the Iraq war. Perhaps Kerry's failure to gain an advantage reflects the public's view, captured in other polls, that Kerry does not have a clear plan himself for dealing with the Iraq situation.

Another interesting finding is that, while Bush has a modest lead (51-43) over Kerry in terms of who the public trusts more to handle the responsibilities of commander-in-chief, the public expresses an identical degree of confidence in the ability of Bush and Kerry to handle the responsibilities of commander-in-chief (61 percent in each case).

In terms of favorability ratings, it seems significant that Kerry's net favorability rating (favorable minus unfavorable) is now substantially higher than Bush's. Kerry is +23 on this measure (58 percent favorable/35 percent unfavorable), up from +17 in Gallup's last measurement in April. In
contrast, Bush is just +8 (53/45), down from +14 in April. These data are consistent with the recent New York Times story that suggested the GOP's frontal assault on Kerry has not had much success creating an unfavorable image of him.

So despite the the 80 million in deceitful attack ads dumped on the Battleground states by Rove Sideous, John Kerry's poll numbers are gradually getting better, and the Presidents numbers are tanking. This comes as no shock to the the Imperial Reelection Committee.

And by the way, pay no mind to that utter load of crap that Fox News produced a few days ago that show improvement across the board in Bush's numbers compared to the Gallup Poll. Nothing that emerges from the mouths of the reality technicians at Fox news is worth believing. Memo to Fox, having Hannity ask around the Newsroom is not a scientific poll, no matter what Darth Ailes and his Sith Master Murdoch put in the company newsletter.

Even the jaded Political staff here at the wire has difficulty grokking the idea that the Bush geeks dropped 80 million to produce these awful numbers. And no doubt this is not lost on G2 and his VP, Mr. Big Time. In fact a pair of interesting events shaped up in the past few weeks that point to a White House that is, perhaps, staring at those portraits wondering if they might have a few worthwhile thoughts to share.

One that struck us here at the Wire occurred when the President went to Rome to drop a Medal of Freedom on the Pope. Now this sounds like big deal, but lets remember that Doris Day and Charlton Heston have one of these things. This visit to the Vatican City came about shortly after a few Catholic Bishops announced that they would refuse communion to John Kerry, A Catholic, because of his stance on the issue of a woman's right to choose. How they reconcile with the Presidents thirst for execution is a mystery to the Catholic mafia here at the Wire.

Now, Bishops have considerable latitude within their diocese, and most Bishops were at best cool to the idea of starting a political brawl over Abortion in the middle of the an election cycle. Not to mention that the Catholic laity displayed little enthusiasm for the idea. However, that failed to deter our resolute decision maker in chief, who reportedly told the Pope he wanted to advance the Pope's social agenda, but "not all the bishops are with me."

S. When we first read this story, a few of our editors had to be sedated and sharp objects removed from the Mojowre command center. Did the President just wink nudge the Pope into leaning on his Bishops to crack down on Pro Choice Catholics. Now, right wing cranks in the Catholic Church and the Evangelical movement have been agitating for a good old fashioned Church beatdown for decades over Abortion.

But the President, in so many words, asked the Pope to help him get reelected by using the sacrament of communion to lean on John kerry and get him in trouble with the Catholic vote. A vote Republicans have worked overtime to secure and cannot quite get the same kind of support they get from the Evangelical Protestants.

So tell us Mr. President, what exactly should the Pope do to get the Bishops to "be with you"? It sounds to us that the President wants to bring back the good old days when Popes put whole nations under interdiction for pissing him off, cutting them off from the Sacraments, or excommunicated rebellious politicians who didn't toe the lie. Is the President that worried about his reelection and John Kerry that he has the elephant balls to ask the Pope to put an ex-cathedra whammy on the Democrats?

You bet the did. The devious little weasel would burn every Tree on the White House grounds if he thought the Dark Lord Sauron would bring him the orc vote. It's an no brainer for the scum at the West Wing to try to work the sickly Pope into influencing the election. Nevertheless, the American Bishops have basically pushed this whole issue beyond the election cycle before they weigh in on it. Sucks to be you W.

The Next event occurred just a few days ago on the Senate Floor. As the Senate gathered to take some pictures together, Senator Pah Leahy, the ranking Democrat on the Justice Committee, came over to say hello to VP Dick Big Time Cheney.

Dick, according to witnesses, recoiled and informed Senator Leahy that he was less than pleased over his and other dems comments and criticisms about him and Halliburton. Senator Leahy told the VP he wasn't fond of the Schmucks in the Religious Right calling him and other Catholic Democrats bad Catholics, and trying to snitch to the Pope about it.

That’s when Dick promptly dropped the F bomb on the Senator, suggesting that he pleasure himself anally while it was " still legal". What the...? While it's still legal...? Is the VP so cranked up these days that a simple Hello from the other side of the aisle drives him into a rage where he drops the F bomb and then utters weird crap like that?

And while we're chatting about the VP, why is he, days after the 9/11 commission broke the bad news to the rest of the suckers that the Al Queda/Sadam connection was a load of donkey crap, pimping this lie to everyone still? He tells Gloria Borger on mace the Nation he never said it
was confirmed, and then the Daily show runs the clip where he does say on National Television. Did the VP forget we invented Videotape? Surprise Dick!

As the Plame investigators bad cop good cop the VP and President, and the torture memos expose the Administration for the Emperor Ming wannabes they are, we should expect more and more little episodes of the President and the Vice President acting out like disturbed teenagers. Particularly if their poll numbers continue to drop...

I wonder what the Nixon portrait will say in the final days...?

And now the music is telling me that we have an incoming transmission from the redoubtable Dr. S9…

J. That’s right. It is time once again for our regular contributor Dr. Strychnine, reporting from his super-secret, ultra-dope, mega-cool, extra-jiggy, Mojohaus spy satellite of love high in geosynchronous orbit above Baghdad by the Bay…take it away S9…

S9 Greetings fellow Earth orbit workers! And a hearty shout out as well to our comrades everywhere in the galaxy where the signal from this transmitter can be demodulated and realized as speech. Long live the first interstellar!

Before the dog days of summer arrive in the Northern Hemisphere, and the political campaigns heat up in the twin cities of Washington D.C. and Baghdad, Iraq, sucking all the oxygen out of the public discourse until well into November -- we here on the S9 Station command and control
deck would like to take this opportunity to say a few words about the Terran energy economy to our ground station logistics team.

The fact is -- your planet is running out of cheap oil. Up here in low earth orbit, we don't have any oil we didn't make ourselves -- so we know how expensive life without cheap oil is going to be for you. But a lot of your friends and neighbors down there at the bottom of the gravity well are colossally clueless about the issue. You need to help educate them.

It doesn't help that environmental activists have been bleating for the last thirty years that the Earth is ''running out of petroleum'' while everyone around them keeps burning more and more fossil fuels and there hasn't really been a serious and prolonged shortage on the world oil and gas markets since the OPEC interventions of the 1970's. The reason it doesn't help is that you're not running out of oil -- you're running out of cheap oil.

Think about what goes into the price of a gallon of gasoline. If you're an American, the first things that probably come to mind are taxes -- but Americans have an extremely low rate of taxation on energy consumption. No, the real issue you need to get your head around is production costs.

Allow me to introduce you to your friend and mine: the Energy Profit Ratio (EPR). The EPR is the ratio of how much energy you can produce in relation to how much energy you have to consume to produce it. To make a gallon of gasoline, you have to burn some gasoline producing it.

You have to locate the oil fields, drill the wells, heat the oil in the ground so you can pump it, then you have to pump it out of the ground, pump it through a pipeline (that you probably have to burn a
lot of gasoline driving around in armored columns trying to protect, but that's another story), ship it across the ocean on a steamship, heat it up some more in order to refine it, and push it around on trucks to filling stations. And that's far from a complete list of things you have to do.

Still, after burning all that gasoline making more gasoline, the EPR of petroleum fuel is high enough that you can get as much as a hundred gallons in return for every gallon you burn producing them. That's an EPR of 100 to 1.

The problem -- as I said before -- is that the planet is running out of cheap oil. By that, I mean the ratio is dropping. All the easy oil fields have been pumped out in North America. Production rates are already declining everywhere in the world except the Middle East. It costs more and more to find and develop new oil fields. The rate of discovery for new proven oil reserves is plummeting like a stone. The oil we do find is harder and harder to recover, costing more in fuel to make the fuel needed to recover more fuel. Demand continues to soar as new industrial development, particularly in Asia, comes online.

But that's not the bad news. The bad news is that the EPR for every alternative fuel source you can think of (and is even remotely practical) is much, much lower than the EPR of oil and natural gas. The next best alternative is coal, which is only about a third as efficient as fossil crude -- and that's before you do any of the magick to mitigate against the release of greenhouse gases.

Nuclear, solar, wind, hydro, geotherm, soy-diesel, all the earthy-crunchy eco-geek favorites have way lower EPR numbers than even coal. Some of them -- like solar, for example -- still have negative EPR numbers. That means it costs more energy to make and install a solar panel than you will ever get out of using it over its entire natural lifetime.

Most of the developed world's energy economy is dependent on the EPR of oil and natural gas. When that number falls -- as it has been for a couple years now, and will continue to do from now until forever -- the price of energy in dollars will go up dramatically. If you thought $2.00 per gallon for unleaded was a raw deal, wait until it costs you a whole paycheck just to fill up the tank in a Toyota Prius. Think it won't be so bad? You haven't done the math.

If you want to know what's giving Dick Cheney nightmares these days: it's this. He knows all about Energy Price Ratios, and what life will be like in America when all the recoverable oil in the world is under the ground in places like Baghdad. And he also knows -- by the time all the oil in the world is either gone up the smokestack or not worth the cost of pumping it out of the ground -- that he'll be dead from old age. It'll be your world to fix. Not his.

The good news: the peak of cheap oil production will prevent the worst doomsday scenarios of global warming from coming to pass; the information: windmills and solar panels cannot run all your bulldozers, elevators, steel mills, cement factories, electric heat, air conditioning, aircraft, automobiles, etc.,

and still have enough energy left over to support a corrupt political system, armies, and a steady flow of summer blockbuster movies.

J. While you are sitting there despairing over the fact that we are trying our level best to turn Iraq into another Vietnam, complete with corrupt proxy government uniformly despised by its people, a sputtering economy and environmental policy written by Christian doomsday cultists and stripminers, take heart... there are things moving right now and it is not as dark out here as some would have us believe.

For instance, it was a no-brainer seeing yet another Michael Moore anti-Bush polemic coming, but what has been surprising has been the general public reaction to the movie. And sure, we all expected some folks from Planet Show Biz to get their grills on the tube running down the current administration... yeah, Babs, I'm talking to you...but some are going right over the top with a political counterstrike planned for September.

And finally, Dollar Bill Grieder, writes in the Nation this week about a Fifth Column movement from within the Beltway by folks who reject the criminal stoopidty of the Bush Administration and want to see them and all their devices run into the Potomac.

To begin with, Farenheit 9/11 might well be Michael Moore's best film yet, and still it is probably pretty predictable for anyone who has seen Roger and Me, Bowling for Columbine or any of his TV Nation or The Awful Truth shows. Moore does the two things he does best, find great B-roll of people speaking when they didn't think anyone was listening and then asking really uncomfortable questions of people in authority.

The surprising part about this film has been the public's reaction to it. For instance, here in Irvine, of all places, if you don't already have a ticket to see it, then you probably won't get to see it this weekend, and it's being shown on two screens here at the University Theater. Apparently, this is a scene that is playing out across the nation at the 1,000 or so theaters that are carrying "Farenheit." By the way, that's twice as many theaters as originally planned.

The Right's non-stop, purple-faced, bloviating against the movie, which has been broadcast 24/7 for the past two weeks on every cable news outlet and in every newspaper in the Western World has had roughly the same effect of Wile E. Coyote's Road-Runner-Explode-O-Matic-Deluxe, manufactured by the good people at Acme products.

Guys like Bush Campaign chair Ken Mehlman and Dan Bartlett are now walking around town looking like a cartoon bomb has just gone and plastered their domes with black smudge and blown all their hair off...

You know, the Left managed to get it right about Mel Gibson's the Jesus Chainsaw Massacre. We made our criticisms heard, and then we just *left*it*alone*. But not the Right, ohhh nooo... that would have been too easy. And now they are poised to make Michael Moore the single most successful documentarian in the history of film. You guyz rock!

Yeah, you think a seasoned old Washington insider Dick Cheney isn't feeling the branch creak a bit right now, when he's careening around D.C. dropping f-bombs in public like Chris Rock in an HBO special?

Then there is this plan in the works to stage a massive "Concert for Change" in Giant Stadium on Sept. 1, the same date and rougly the same time that GOP is coronating W for another tour of America's golf courses at taxpayer expense. And the kicker is this, the headliner for this show might well be none other than Bruce Springsteen.

Just think about that one for a moment, at the time W. is being crowned king of the Jelly Bean people, The Boss will be just across the Hudson calling out his gang of feckless thugs and exhorting people to run them into the sea.

The promoter of the show, which will apparently happen with or without Springsteen, has set up a site: to get people to sign a petition asking Springsteen to perform. Given the fact that Springsteen has lent his voice to the progressive public arena, this is not so far-fetched. Springsteen has gone so far as to publish Al Gore's NYU speech on his own website, saying: "A few weeks ago at N.Y.U. Al Gore gave one of the most important speeches I've heard in a long time. The issues it raises need to be considered by every American concerned with the direction our country is headed in."

Momentarily leaving aside the question of where the hell that version of Al Gore was four years ago, I am also reminded of Springsteen's rap in the video for his remake of Edwin Starr's anthemic 70s hit "War" when he said, "It's 1984, and in 1984, blind obedience to a President, to a government or anything will get you killed."

That's a guy I would like to see on the left bank of the Hudson carrying the banner for the working people whom the Bush Administration has declared war on in this country at the very moment the GOP is cooking up their "final solution."

S. But beyond filmmakers and rock stars, there is another dynamic to this situation. Dollar Bill Greider points to a growing inside the Beltway insurgency against the crimes of the Bush Administration, from torturing detainees, to lying to Congress about Medicare, to the terrorist background of our handpicked Iraqi King.

Sure, as Greider points out, leaks are a form of legal currency in Washington. As an insider you can eat and drink for weeks on end on a good leak, but there's something more to this current level of pourousness. We'll let Dollar Bill speak for himself for a moment:

"We don't need to know the identities to grasp that these and other over-the-transom "communications" provided forceful and well-timed contradictions to the White House line. It is also obvious that these leaks could not have come from the lower depths of the bureaucracy. The material is too sensitive for wide distribution. Not to take anything away from aggressive reporters, but the leakers clearly targeted the Post, Times and Journal to achieve maximum impact on Washington. The messages are not from some office crank at the Xerox machine but had to originate among sophisticated and highly placed officers of government.

My own surmise-corroborated in conversations with several long-experienced Washington reporters-is that we are probably talking about career military officers and senior civil servants at the Pentagon, Justice Department lawyers and professionals at the CIA or State Department. In practice, sensitive documents are sometimes passed off laterally to former colleagues no longer in government who provide them to the chosen reporters. Some risk to one's career is required, but these are smart people who know how to cover their tracks."

Why are these people coming out of the woodwork now? Perhaps some are shamed for not standing up for what they knew was right the first time, before the war. Perhaps some were geuinely duped and are now mad as hell about it; a whole city full of Daniel Elsbergs with white-hot peppers of rage lodged in their ... well, places where white-hot peppers of rage should probably not go if you are a sitting President with poll numbers starting to fall into the 40s...

These are the signs and portents that remind me of Bobby Kennedy when he once described political activism to a pebble being dropped into still water. Small ripples proceed from the center where the stone was dropped. And if enough pebbles are dropped into the water, they build and build until they create giant waves...okay, so the actual wave-physics of the simle don't really work, but you get the picture.

And a quick aside to JK, look dude, don't think for a moment that we won't turn around and cack you like a sick cat if we get you elected and you turn into some watered down version of W with an IQ above 90. Get used to life in a petrie dish Sen. Kerry, we aren't going anywhere.

But the good news this morning is that there really is a legitimate hint of change on the wind. So this is the time to keep pushing, keep the heat on, keep blogging, writing, speaking, shouting. You are not alone.

It's time -- it's on!

J. It's 130 days until election day and our patriotic thought for the week is: Alternative fuels research and development, means the terrorists win, or as John Ashcroft says... “Hey, why're all them Bishop-fellas wearin' dresses like a bunch of sissies...”

S. And that’s all for this week, tune in again soon for another exciting installment, until, of course, we are declared enemies of the state.

And remember, you can now email the Mojowire at, that’s Email, us hippies!

J. And now you can check out the Mojowire online at; you can read the entire archive along with our general ramblings...

This has been the Mojowire, brought to you by Mojohaus...Mojohaus-fine journalism, afflicting the comfortable since 1988, and produced by our super funky fly producer Mike Payne and the Darkling Eclectica, here on KUCI, 88.9...

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