Saturday, March 05, 2005

Signs of Impending Doom

Yeah, the end is nigh, the curtain of eternal night is falling, it is The Triumph of the Zombie Will...

So, there I was crusing my favorite legal blogs looking for something erudite to enlighten an otherwise lazy Saturday afternoon, when what should appear to mine wondering eye as I gaze upon the ACS Blog, official blog of the American Constitutional Society, this lovely little tidbit...

Begin Transmission:

They Can't Show Dawn of the Dead in Kentucky Either
William Poole, a Kentucky high school student, was arrested on felony charges for writing a short story.
"My story is based on fiction," said Poole, who faces a second-degree felony terrorist threatening charge. "It's a fake story. I made it up. I've been working on one of my short stories, [and] the short story they found was about zombies. Yes, it did say a high school. It was about a high school over ran by zombies."
But local police say the setting of Poole's story renders it illegal. "Anytime you make any threat or possess matter involving a school or function it's a felony in the state of Kentucky," said Winchester Police detective Steven Caudill."

Turns out this kid was busted on Tuesday after his grandparents found a short story he was working on for school and turned it in to school authorities. He was summarily picked up by the cops, and had his bail raised from $1000 to $5000 at the request of prosecutors "given the serious nature of the charges."

It was then that some socially deviant malcontent wrote in the comments section: "Poor, poor detective Caudill. He is about to meet the business end of 42 U.S.C. §1983."

So I decided to take a quick jaunt over to and see what all the hubub was about.

Yeah... looks like this sloping forehead redneck could be about to get a severe schooling in federal jurisprudence, to wit:

"Section 1983. Civil action for deprivation of rights
Every person who, under color of any statute, ordinance, regulation, custom, or usage, of any State or Territory or the District of Columbia, subjects, or causes to be subjected, any citizen of the United States or other person within the jurisdiction thereof to the deprivation of any rights, privileges, or immunities secured by the Constitution and laws, shall be liable to the party injured in an action at law, suit in equity, or other proper proceeding for redress, except that in any action brought against a judicial officer for an act or omission taken in such officer's judicial capacity, injunctive relief shall not be granted unless a declaratory decree was violated or declaratory relief was unavailable. For the purposes of this section, any Act of Congress applicable exclusively to the District of Columbia shall be considered to be a statute of the District of Columbia."

Yeah... this could be very amusing for the law enforcement establishment in Red Neckistan. Does this kid have a legal defense fund? Are there any brave attorneys out there looking to get in their pro bono hours in.

We can only hope and pray that a beating of biblical proportions in front of a federal judge is on the way for Det. Caudill. Nice Job Redneckistan, we are throwing high school kids in jail for writing stories about zombies.

Memo to the 'Necks...zombies are not real, this kid was not seriously plotting to get his "House of the Dead" on at his local High School. He was not planning on creating a Zombie army just so he could engage in a little target practice during home room.

Or maybe...just maybe... his story hits a little too close to home for some of them inbred blue skin country boys... hmmm...maybe he was on to something... A little of the Insmouth look perhaps? stay tuned

mojo sends

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