Thursday, July 20, 2006

Vrooom Vrooom!

Roy Edriso at Alicublog does a nice roundup on Neoconservative wankery on the Israeli/Hezbollah brawl:

Billy Kristol is going "Vrrrrow, Vrrrrow, rat-tat-tat-tat" and dive-bombing his shampoo and conditioner bottles in the tub; Roger L. Simon is telling the terrified Lebanese citizens to take their bombing like men -- "Starbucks can come later, if you really think you need it" (?!? -- RE); and this guy cheerfully compares the new Mideast war to a plucky little sailor (Israel) beating the shit out a Marine (Hezbollah) -- with (one must assume) Beirut's civilians in the role of unfortunate bystanders to the brawl who are struck by the Marine's flying teeth, which for some reason are filled with high explosives. It's getting so George Fucking Will sounds almost sane.

If this brawl had gone down a few weeks earlier, Rush would not have needed that Viagra for his "Boys" trip to the D.R. One of my favorite whackjobs, Danny Pipes, offers his take in the LA Time opinion page today:

With the emergence of an aggressive and perhaps soon-to-be nuclear-armed Iran, the strategic map of the Middle East is in the throes of fundamental change. This overarching threat should provide the backdrop for every Israeli decision going forward — whether to retake territory in Gaza, what to target in Lebanon and whether to launch military actions against Syria.

Sure, don't stop with Hezbollah, just crank up the war machine and Let's get it ON! Why not right? It's not like Danny Boy is going to suit up for Israel and stand a post in the West Bank or take fire in an ambush in South Lebanon. So why not just advocate the escalation of the conflict? With friends like these, does Israel really need Hezbollah?

When guys like Daniel Pipes, who never saw a Middle East shootout he wouldn't volunteer your kids to go fight, comes screeching out of the secret CrankCave where these guys hang upside down by their claws until summoned forth to plague the living, you know blood is in the water. Not to mention the usual NeoCon delusions, check this out:

Paradoxically, developments of the past week bring good news: Many Middle Easterners, not just Israelis, fear Iranian ambitions. Worries about Iran prompted the Saudi kingdom to take the lead in condemning attacks by Hamas and Hezbollah on Israel as "rash adventures." As the Jerusalem Post's Khaled Abu Toameh has documented, Israel's counterattacks have prompted "an anti-Hezbollah coalition." Sound Israeli policies will greatly influence the evolution of this nascent force.

Whatever fear of a Shiite Crescent, as King Abdullah of Jordan put it, is behind these Saudi statements, you would have to be drinking the bong water to convince yourself that Israel is going to forge a consensus among it's Middle East Neighbors that includes using even more military force in Gaza and Syria. Who allows these people access to Op/Ed sections of major American dailies? Do the editors actually read this stuff before they paste it in?

I don't suppose it occurred to Danny Pipes that maybe Iran and extremist groups opposed to peaceful coexistence with Israel are the real winners when Israel hits civilian targets and creates 500,000 civilian refugees. And yes Red State, I know that Hezbollah places missile launch sites in civilian areas to draw Israel fire down on Civilians. Hezbollah is to blame for a large amount of the casualties in Lebanon because of their tactics. But hitting civilian Beirut neighborhoods that are largely anti-Hezbollah does not help Israel hold the moral high ground. Nor would a large IDF push to Damascus or into the occupied territories.

I don't suppose it occurred to anyone down at the Middle East forum where Mr. Pipes relaxes with friends over a nice glass of O Positive that what we are seeing is an attempt by the militants in Hezbollah and Hamas to silence their more moderate elements at Israel's expense. It spoils the whole narrative if you start getting all Neville Chamberlain-ey and start examning the WHY.

Oh yeah, I forgot. All Arabs are terrorists. Islam is the religion of hate..yadda yadda yadda, my God is bigger than your God because my God has a prescription for Viagra. Dammit, I keep forgetting my lines...Does anyone have a script handy?

No comments: